1) breathe.
Focus on your breathing until the initial wave of anger has passed. It may help to focus on counting the breaths.
Allow your breathing to deepen and slow.
2) label.
Say you yourself, “I feel angry.” Labeling the emotion brings your thoughtful brain back online.
This helps move beyond the Fight or Flight reaction of the reptilian brain
3) acknowledge.
Recognize the steps that brought you into this situation. What part did you play in the buildup to this anger?
Taking responsibility for your part helps point to small changes that you can take to avoid anger next time.
4) plan.
After acknowledging your part in the situation, notice where you can make different choices next time.
Visualize yourself making different choices to help increase the chance of remembering when necessary.
- - - - optional - - - -
5) apologize.
Depending on the situation, it may serve you to apologize. Taking responsibility for your part in the situation can help restore your relationship with the other party.